12-19-2006
Wow. Over a month…
…Since my last post. I didn’t even realize that I was stringing my 2 viewers along for such an amount of time! Seriously though, I have a good excuse. That’s right, I was being lazy. Well, kinda-sorta. I should have had my next video game review (AGiR) for Final Fantasy XII out 3 weeks ago, but I was a little overwhelmed at the daunting task of trying to review such an expansive title, especially considering the fact that I haven’t even played it for more than 2 hours during the past month (and that was only running around the same area trying to level up and earn cash). Well, now that I have explained myself, I’ll try and do my best to get it out by the New Year. In the meantime, here’s a mini-review of a title for my latest hand-held console, the Nintendo DS:
Brain Age: Train Your Brain in Minutes a Day
Brain Age is one of those “games” that I could never understand. “You want me to learn while I’m trying to have fun?!” I used to swear them off by the boat-loads. I didn’t want Mario teaching me how to type, and I certainly didn’t want to learn science from a blue hedgehog that wears running shoes… SHOES, I SAY!!! At any rate, I must be showing my age, because when I saw this one advertised, It really caught my attention. “My brain has an age?”, I thought to myself, “I must know this age of brain, lest mine be old and I forget where I hid the treasure!” Just kidding, I never said “lest”. The following is a journal of my foray into the deepest mystery of modern gaming science, the prefrontal cortex!
Brain Age is based on the research of Japanese neuroscientist Dr. Ryuta Kawashima regarding brain function and stimulation. The good doctor was even so kind as to lend his digital likeness to the game. I think they were going for a “Max Headroom” feel, because even I know that the visually inferior DS is capable of giving a face more than 20 polygons…
Best Friends
Get used to that face, ’cause he’ll be watching your every move while you play learn plearn. After an interesting lesson on how the prefrontal cortex works, you are given your preliminary brain age test, which always consists of 3 randomly generated activities which all make use of either the touch-screen or built in microphone. The “watch on the left, write on the right” concept requires that you turn the DS 90 degrees to the left, so it feels a lot like holding a book… From the future. Accuracy and speed are the common denominators for all of the games; something that made me feel a little cheated until I realized that pretty much every single kind of test in the world is based on these two principles. Once you have completed the activities, the doctor gives you your “brain age”, which, if you haven’t been given any insight or advice on how to complete these tests up front, will likely be in-between 50 and 80 (That’s bad, by the way. 20 is the best possible score). At this point the game pulls it’s first bit of staying power genius, by basically telling you;
”Ouch, you suck! Better call in sick for the next 2 weeks, ’cause you’re too stupid to drive! How did you even know which sock to put on which foot?”
…And then, it’s on. We’ll now explore some of the mini-game, and discuss how many times each of them made me cry. Did I say “mini-review”? What I meant to say was, “mini-licious!”
1. Calculations X 20:
This is about the first game you’re introduced to, requiring that you write the answers to the scrolling mathematical problems as quickly as possible. It never really gets too hard, seeing as you are only adding, subtracting or multiplying, and usually with single-digit numbers to boot. It does penalize you 5 seconds for every wrong answer, and you must have the legibility of a right angle, so things can get a little hard when you’re trying to go for a new record of 20 correct questions in 15 seconds. Although a bit basic, I enjoyed this one, and so did my prefrontal cortex. This game also comes in an “X 100″ version for more severe headaches and eye-strain! And I don’t know who the Idiot was that thought that 5 X 5 = 28, but I hope there’s a short bus out there somewhere taking him off to a padded room.
2. The Stroop Test:
I don’t know who, what, when or how “Stroop” is, and I’m too lazy to Google it right now. Pretty much, it’s one of those old optical illusions that make both sides of your brain fight…for the right…to party. I also discovered that this activity stimulates the prefrontal cortex as well. A name of a color shows up on the screen, but the font color is a different color than the word itself. You have to say the font color aloud into the mic, and not the word shown on-screen itself. For example, the word “BLACK” shows up on the screen, but the color of the word is yellow. You must say “yellow”, while the other side of your brain is trying to make you read the word “black”. This works well in theory, if in fact the score keeper is another human being, whose ears were made by the same God who made yours. But, if in fact, you’re relying on a $135.00 piece of equipment to recognize words that come from your unique voice box, you might as well give yourself a brain age of “dead” on this one. For some reason, the darn thing doesn’t like to hear the word “blue”. It had about a 10% success rate, even with the 2 other people I’ve watched attempt it. And all that makes you do is start yelling each word louder and slower into the microphone, which not only keeps your brain age high, but your blood pressure as well. I give this one “BLUE! thumbs down”.
3. Number Cruncher:
Numbers appear on the screen in different colors and alignments, while doing various things, such as rotating, pulsing, and sliding from side to side. Your goal is to exercise your prefrontal cortex by answering the questions as quickly as possible while trying to ignore the visual distractions. Pretty easy, except when you’re trying to count all of the red #3’s, and there are 7 of them sliding around merging into each other… It gets a little hard to keep track. If I was on a desert Island and I found this game in the sand, I’d play it once or twice… Then I’d write an S.O.S on it a chuck it out to sea.
4. Maze Craze
It was about this time that I realized that pretty much everything in the world activates the friggin’ prefrontal cortex. It reminded me of the time that I caught my mom in a lie for trying to tell me that both milk AND broccoli help me grow big and strong. Thanks, Mom; now look what you’ve done…
This one balances between good and evil, almost like Dinobot from Beast Wars. The goal is to drag the red dot along a path using the stylus and connect symbols in an alpha-numeric pattern, i.e.; “A-1-B-2-C-3″. Not the biggest of deals, but the catch is that you cannot touch any symbol out of order, or you accrue penalty time. I also noticed that because of holding the stylus, the bottom right hand (for me) corner is completely obstructed, thus making it difficult to locate about 1/4 of your targets. This one is more fun when you’re competing against another user for the best time. Now that I think about it, it’s exactly like Dinobot…
5. Draw:
Right when the games start to get a little repetitive, B.A. throws a curve-ball. Every so often, when you try to conduct your daily brain age test, the good doctor will throw in a random exercise. One of them is some sort of highly advanced technologically innovative activity: drawing.
This is actually pretty entertaining. The doctor will tell you to draw something, completely from memory. It could be something as simple as a rhino, or something a little harder, like the Mona Lisa. After you complete 3 consecutive drawings, the computer will show side-by-side comparisons of your attempt versus the computer’s offering. Of course the computer’s will always look better, because it didn’t have to draw the image using a 3′’ plastic utensil with a tip the size of a crayon, but I think that’s the point. Degradation will always keep ‘em coming back for more!
Last but not first: Sudoku:
While not actually a part of the brain age tests, the game’s maker’s included a full stand-alone version of Sudoku. With over 200 puzzles of varying difficulty, this is probably one of the game’s best features. The controls are fantastic; the board appears in the right-hand (for me) touch screen until you’re ready to input a number. At that point you tap which box you want to select, and the right-hand screen zooms in for ample writing space, while the overhead board shifts to the left screen for quick reference. You can even have the computer tell you when you’ve made a mistake (up to 5 times; after that, it’s game over). I hadn’t yet hopped on the Sudoku band-wagon that was encroaching upon me until I gave it a try on the D.S. This one gets big Sudo-kudos from me.
In closing:
There are close to ten more activities in Brain Age, but I tried to pick out the ones that show the most variety. The game only allows you access to new activities once you’ve been a faithful student and have racked up enough logged days of training. In fact, I’ve logged about two weeks worth, and I still have 3 activities that I haven’t even unlocked yet, so that’s saying something for the game’s replay value. All in all, I think the whole “brain age” concept is just a gimmick. Just like any other game, the more you play, the better you get. I haven’t found myself being able to recite “Of Mice and Men” verbatim, but who knows? Maybe I’m getting more out of it than I know yet. Only time will tell, but in the mean-time, this is one class I don’t mind sitting through.
GRADE: B+ (Moderate entertainment value, moderate challenge)
Posted by Jordan in Video Game Reviews | RSS 2.0
Blue!!! It’s making me see red, and my yellow bellied black friend is trying to slide his number across my leg….ARGHH!! Once again, an excellent piece of journalistic……gold. Informative, funny, keeps my attention…..”what was I saying?” Oh yeah, and that’s hard to do. I give this game a 2 out of 3 thumbs up. Wait, that’s not a thumb. More like a pinkie toe……..whatever. You get the point, I agree this game is addicting when trying to best your buddy. Good review.
You should do one for AMERICAN IDOL!